good morning slacker!

so this post is one week late. its suppose to be oct.9,2009. 9am


so guess what? my very early morning post would be having him sleep on my bed. good morning diay mga bai! :D

at around 3.30 in the morning, i am still wide awake smoking my pretty face out while drinking my lukewarm coffee (i don't like hot drinks by the way) just to finish my effin thesis in preparation for this afternoon's re-defense. FIGHT!

so i noticed that JL just came home so i shouted "LAAGAN!!!" (if you're not aware, he's just living right across the street. exactly adjacent to my chiong's :) he then called out my name and asked me to come right down so we can have a little chat.

he smelled of Redhorse but i didn't care 'coz i know i smell like that too when i'm drunk. so i told him, "HUBOG MAN KA GANG..." he agreed. then we started talking about how SAGAL paid for 2 buckets of Redhorse plus pulutan and washing. we also talked about Mikmik's bad tripping with his parents until the conversation came right down to Bungo. so he was drunk too all right. at around 4 in the morning, i decided to call it a night with JL since i really think he's really tired and i still have to make some final polishing for my thesis.

by the time i got in and checked my phone, i was surprised to see a text message coming from him asking if he could come over to Chiong's because he needs a place to sleep for the night since he had a fight with his dad. lovefooled as i am, ofcourse i said yes. knowing that he will come over made my whole body shiver - i don't exactly understand why but...i don't know.

well, anyway, he came over looking oh so drunk. i told him to just sleep since i still have to finish my thesis, he just smiled and said "Sure ba?" and to sound casual, "eh kung paulion tika?" i answered back. we finished the conversation with faint smiles.

it was already 5 in the morning when i decided to call it off. when i came in the room, i noticed that he was sleeping on a slanting position so i still have to think on how i could sleep without waking him up. when i managed to position myself, sleep wouldn't visit me - as a matter of fact, i was really,REALLY awake. so what i did, i just sat in front of him and watched him sleep. lots of thoughts came through my mind - lots of flashbacks even.

and the weirdest thing i did?waking up in the morning, falling in love with person who broke my standards. heck! i didn't even sleep! i was really wide awake! oh my fuckin' shit! how could this happen to me?? how could i fall inlove with someone who is so cruel? and why would i even bother to take time off my day and try to prove to him that i am oh so okay when i fact i am not!

as emo as it may sound, every night i wait for him. every alcohol i take is for him. it even surprises me for the things that i could do just to keep him around - all this because of what??!!!!!!!!!!!!! FUCK LOVE!

so, i tried to lay down and this time i told him to move aside. we hugged afterwards. my heart melted. my whole world stopped. it's just so sad to think that we can only do this if we are both drunk or when he is drunk. it bleeds my heart to know that after this, we will back to our own world again just as if nothing happened.

then, it was 5.30. it's time to get up and continue my thesis.

he woke up at around 7. he said he's going.